No news...is good news?

I can honestly say that I thought we would have a new child in our home by now.  There seemed to be such a need and I figured if God had put us in this class that we would get a child as soon as we returned home from our vacation.  I heard of families who got their first call just four hours after they completed their Pride class or days after.  Its been 3 weeks since we finished our class.  I miss seeing our friends on a weekly basis, but I know that they are there for support if we need them.

While we were on vacation I began reading a great book that my friend gave me the day we left called "Another Place at the Table" by Kathy Harrison.  God gave us some not so great weather in the beginning of the week and it allowed me to finish the book half way through our trip.  It was an easy read and a informative read for our foster care future.

Kathy is a foster mom back in the 90's when things were quite different than they are now.  But this book was very informative and it gave me a glimpse into the life of a foster family.  It showed me how quickly kids could come and go and how flexible a foster parent needs to be with these transactions.  It gave me great insight on how to handle those tough situations that only therapist should handle.  It allowed me to think about how I will react in a crisis.  Kathy had a million things going on and then one of her kids decided to get her attention by grabbing the legs of the family cat and swinging her around the room.  The kids were crying and the cat was hurt.  What was Kathy's reaction?  She calmly told the kids to go do whatever they needed to do and asked her daughter to join her in their den.  They sat in silence for a while and finally when she could find the words to say she just asked her what happened.  She didn't yell or punish her.  She knew this was a tender moment and she had to use it in the right way.  Her daughter began to open up and talk about some of her life and Kathy was able to understand her better and had a better understanding of how to help her.  Kathy didn't let her get away with what she did but she calmly advised her to come to her when she was scarred, instead of hurting something, someone or herself.  Kathy says it perfectly about this situation "Its ironic really.  Those of us with the least training, at the bottom of the food chain so to speak, are the ones with the day-to-day control in the lives of these kids.  In a crisis like this, I have to decide how to respond."  And although she did feel incapable she handled the situation very well.

Kathy puts it so well.  She says, "It comes as no surprise that finding families willing to open their doors to the rigors of foster parenting is so hard.  Fostering means knowing about the things most of us would prefer to forget.  It means recognizing that our best is often not good enough.  It means only knowing the difficult beginnings of a story and being forced to imagine the end.  It means loving children who will ultimately leave us.  Then drying our tears and letting ourselves love again."

It is going to be hard, very hard.  But God didn't put us here on earth to live a easy selfish life.  He put us here on earth to serve Him and make disciples of all the nations.  I can best serve Him by loving on any and all the kids He puts into my care.  Even if that does mean I have to let go and trust God in all situations.  I will never give up praying for them.  "I want to live a life that matters, a life that makes a difference."

So as I am waiting here to see where God takes our lives, I am praying for these kids that come into our care.  Right now, I am thankful that there isn't an abundance of calls coming in, that means that for now I am not needed.  For now, a kid is safe at home.  But I pray that when that time comes God will wrap His arms around that child and let them know they are loved while their life gets turned upside down.

For as long as I have them, I will love them the best I know how.